Trace Adkins - Arlington, A tribute to our fallen warriors.

HappyTrinity Sunday

Triune Savior

God's ways are higher than our ways. Though He reveals Himself to us in the Scriptures, we cannot fully grasp who He is. But a mathematic illustration may help us begin to understand.
1 + 1 + 1 cannot equal 1. However, 1 x 1 x 1 does equal 1!
Just as multiplication is a higher form of math than addition, so God's ways are higher than ours. Our heavenly Father does not ask us to understand His triune nature. He asks us to trust in Him and leave the details to Him.
As you ponder the mystery of who God is, also turn your attention to what God does. God has not revealed His triune nature in order to confuse you. He desires to show you the many aspects of His love and work of salvation.

It's so difficult to understand the Trinity. God is One. He is before all other gods. In fact, there are no other gods...except for those that we create for ourselves. Yet, as Christ said, "I and the Father are one" (Jn 10:30). The Holy Spirit proceeds from the Father and the Son. How is this possible? I don't know. I just know that it is. One of these days I'll see Them face-to-face and then I'll go, "That's how You do it!"

Quote above from The Lutheran Study Bible from Concordia Publishing House, p. 1815.

Dora

A week ago Monday we lost Dora. She wasn't even 2 years old yet but such a big part of our family. The poor thing was a favorite bedtime friend of the Peanuts, though she never lasted long. As soon as someone relaxed his/her hold on her, she was outta there!

The night before she died I tried to prepare the Peanuts for her imminent departure. I thought I'd be taking her to the vet to be put to sleep so I knew I needed to tell them that she wasn't going to get any better and that she was going to die. I didn't want them to come home from school to find her gone and hear the news that way. I explained that she had stopped eating and I couldn't get her to take food or water at all. Without eating she wouldn't be able to live.

They were very upset but the Little Prince handled it pretty well. You could tell he was upset but stayed calm. In true Baba fashion he grabbed her food and told me to open her mouth. It was like trying to pry a python's mouth open. Or at least what I've heard it's like. Then he decided that he would open it and I would put the food in. He had no better luck than I did. Very stubborn cat. And I thought it was hard to get the Diva to open her mouth for medicine she doesn't like. Dora won hands down!

The Diva was beside herself. She ran to her room and I could hear her talking. I went in and she was pleading with Jesus not to let Dora die. Over and over again. The first time she prays for something other than the Lord's Prayer with me at night and it's for something I just knew she wouldn't get. Ugh! So we talked about it and we decided that we would ask Him to spare her, BUT...if He decided that she needed to go, then we wanted my aunt to have her. I explained to the Peanuts that she'd died at the age of 2 and never got to have a kitty. The Diva's response, "She'd have her forever?!" I explained that it would just be until we got there and could take care of her ourselves. The Little Prince asked if she would still be sick. I told him she'd be all better. That seemed to clinch it for him.

Now I know that there's no biblical basis for thinking that Dora would be in heaven. We can pretend there's a kitty heaven, but we know the likelihood of that. However I heard a wonderful segment on Issues, Etc. back in the early days of it's "rebirth" (I think with Louis Brighton, but don't hold me to it) about while we have no reason to think there will be animals in heaven, one day there will be a new heaven and a new earth and then we'll see them again. I love that! I want to see General and Little Gen and Bandit and other animals I've loved that I know have gone.

Monday Dora died on her own. I'd run to Beirut to take food to Aunt. I knew she might not make it until the appointment with the vet so I made sure I left Elektra inside with her. When I opened the door Elektra was agitated so I knew she'd gone. When I told the Peanuts that afternoon they took it in stride. They'd done their grieving the night before and given her lots of loving.

However, they are grieving. Friday night the Diva was upset with the Boss (a common occurrence) and just didn't stop crying. I asked her about it and she said it wasn't the Boss. "I want Jesus to send Dora back right now!"

Happy Pentecost!

This week has been a busy one. The Peanuts handled Dora's death pretty well. They pretty much did their grieving Sunday night when I explained that Dora wasn't going to be getting better. I wanted them to be prepared rather than shocked. They did well until Friday night when the Diva started crying for her. She said, "Tell Jesus I want Him to send Dora back right now!"

Yesterday was the May Festival at the kids' school. The Infant section danced to songs from "Mamma Mia". The Little Prince's class danced to "Dancing Queen" and the Diva's class danced to "SOS". I may never hear those songs the same way again. {But I'll always love the movie!}

We hung out at the festival for a while where the Peanuts played and the Boss helped out at the table where the No Smoking club was distributing stickers and other items. They did a really nice job with it and my car is sporting one of their bumper stickers now.

Last night we went to a first Communion for one of our cousins (first cousin to the ones visiting us in the States this summer). It was at 5 and lasted about 2 hours. Then dinner was around 9 at a restaurant up the mountain a bit. It was good! Of course, it's hard to find bad food at one of these restaurants. After about an hour and a half of mezza we got the main course. Interspersed with all of this was dancing. We enjoyed ourselves and the kids even danced. The Diva danced the most. The Little Prince likes to watch and learn the steps before doing them. He likes to dance and does a great job in the school programs, but he likes to know what he's doing first. A few times I caught him standing on the dance floor watching the dancers very closely to see how they were doing the dabka and other dances. But he didn't try them. Maybe one of our trips back. But the Diva had no problem jumping right on in. She spent most of the time dancing with the other girls there and about half an hour or so before the cake was served was asleep with her head on the table. A well-earned rest, in my opinion. Then we had one ourselves when we got home this morning...around 1.

This morning I went down to Beirut to pick up Aunt to spend the night. We're trying to get her to stay longer but we might have to settle for weekends. My plans for this week, besides the usual, include making a list of things I need to get done before our trip. I need to coordinate some things with the house with the Big Prince and make a list of things I need to accomplish, including what things we need to take with us now and what can wait until September when I'm back with the cousins. Of course, most things will just stay here for us to use and enjoy while vacationing. I'm already looking forward to our first trip back.

I hope everyone has a wonderful Pentecost Sunday!

Good-bye!

We love you, Dora, and we'll miss you.

My poor babies

The four-legged ones, that is.

We're looking for a new home for our dog and it looks like we've found one. She had a sleepover Thursday night to see if she'd get along with their little dog. After figuring out how to get the little one over her jealousy the two got along great. But they took her for a run Friday morning. Not a bad idea, she needs the exercise, but then she had trouble walking later on.

The cat hasn't been eating or drinking for a few days. I made an appointment with the vet for yesterday afternoon. I got a call from K to come and get the dog because she was really worried about her. So I went to pick her up so I could take them together. When she walked out the door she could barely stay on her feet. So off we went.

Good news is that while she's still in a lot of pain, it's inflammation that's causing it. She's not sick, just on an anti-inflammatory drug to bring it down and has started glucosamine. She had an injection yesterday that helped a lot but today she's miserable. Barely can walk. But I figure after the first few days the swelling will go down and she'll feel better. Then we can work on moving her to her new home. They do want her...just want to get her feeling better first.

Bad news is that the cat has a tumor on her kidney. We have the option of keeping her alive until we move home in a month and a half and then getting her treatment, but since we have no idea what Baba's job situation will be (or mine) we just can't plan on being able to afford the chemo. Besides, by that time, how effective can we count on it being? So Monday I'll call the vet and arrange to put her to sleep. She's only 2 years old! But she's not eating or drinking at all, and the vitamins in molasses (gel that I give her) isn't going to cut it, I don't think. She's miserable and it kills me to watch her. I'd rather hold her while she goes to sleep for the last time than watch her suffer.

The upside to this? Neither one feels like teasing or chasing the other one so at least it's peaceful around here. At least among the four-legged babies anyway.

Really need a picture of this...

but I'm too lazy.

I went to the produce market today and you can tell that summer's on its way. We've been eating small, green (unripe) plums for weeks now. They're very sour and the Peanuts love them. Today they had ripe plums! I also got some cherries and nectarines. I bought some strawberries and made strawberry shortcake. There's a recipe for the whipped cream but I have no whipping cream and had just been shopping so it's just strawberries on cake this time. Or I might pour a bit of cream on them before we eat them. I didn't want soggy cake waiting for us.

My kitchen counter is making me hungry. I might have to snitch some fruit before the kids are here to raid it for me.

Appointment, please?

I spent the day down in Beirut at the hospital with Aunt. They told us a week ago today to come for this treatment. Her brother picked up the medicine at the Ministry yesterday. So we got there when they told us to, between 8 and 8:30. Then we had to sit and wait in the lobby for 2 hours! Aunt's relative, whose a radiologist at the hospital, went and spoke to them a couple of times but I don't know if it helped. They were full.

We finally get up to the 4th floor and have to wait about another half an hour. There's no bed! They ended up putting her in a room for babies. Most of the patients are cancer patients so this room might have been for sick babies coming in for treatment of some kind. It was too small to be the nursery. I don't know what it was. But they had to put a bed in there for Aunt. There were 4 cribs and 2 incubators. Everyone kept asking Aunt if she had a boy or a girl. (She's in her 60s so you know that was the big joke of the day.) Oh, and no bathroom. To go you have to all the way back down to the ground floor (she was on the 4th).

I had to leave to get the kids. She was staying until evening. I'm worried about her, but I'm sure she's feeling better than she was this morning.

And her relative the radiologist...is my hero. Her stupid insurance company wasn't going to pay anything. They were calling her cancer a preexisting condition. Never mind that she had cancer 30 + years ago. But he kept on them and got them to agree to pay up to $5,000. Doesn't sound like much but over here it covers quite a bit.

Tomorrow I'm cooking some food for her and her brother and taking it to them. They can't have salt, pepper, spices, and he can't have meat. That doesn't leave a lot to chose from. Cola chicken, maybe?

The Challenges and Joys of Motherhood

Here is a wonderful segment from Issues, Etc. It's a mother's round table and it's wonderful. I've been hoping all weekend for a chance to listen and I got it after the kids went to bed. Right before I started listening Baba showed up on Yahoo. I was glad to talk to him but I have to admit that I was getting a bit antsy to sign off and start listening. I wasn't disappointed. And even better, they'll be back on tomorrow. I'll post the second part on Tuesday.

Enjoy!

http://issuesetc.org/2010/05/07/4852/

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Gotta love the press

There's one English-language newspaper here that I can read online. There may be others but I haven't found them. I checked out Jihad Watch today and found THIS article. It makes me very glad that we're heading back to the States this summer. I've had my misgivings. I'd had myself psyched up to stay here for a few years. The war in '06 wasn't too hard on us personally. Our area is Christian and other than jets overhead and the thunder-like sound of bombs in Beirut, and heavier-than-usual traffic in our summer resort area, life was pretty much as usual. However, from what I've been hearing lately, if there's a repeat it could get ugly.

I checked out Monday Morning, a weekly periodical. HERE is an article where a former president is interviewed and has some interesting comments to make about the so-called "resistance", a.k.a. the main trouble makers in this country. While I have no particular love or admiration of the "Christian" party in the majority, this would be yet another reason for me not to add orange to my wardrobe.

After reading these articles I decided to check out the Daily Star and the only article I could find mentioning Israel was THIS one. OK, the goats are important and obviously private property and Israel has no business touching them, however, this is more news worthy? {sigh}

Getting excited!

When we made the move back to Lebanon the plan was to stay here until the Boss graduates high school and then we'd all move back to the States. The Boss for college and the rest of us to be near him. When Baba made the decision a couple of weeks ago that we were moving back this summer, I was a bit disappointed. I'd gotten myself psyched to live here a while.

However, it will be better in so many ways. We can finally be back in a Lutheran church, for one thing. Yeah! But lately I've been remembering all the things I missed when we first left 5 years ago and just got kind of used to not having.

I realized the other day that I'll have a library again. Yes! There's a public library in Bikfaya. It's a nice little one, but most of the books are in Arabic and French. There is a selection in English but we started visiting it around the time I got my Kindle so I didn't take advantage of it. I've gotten out of the habit of thinking "I need to check that out from the library" when I hear of a good book. But, once we're back, I can look for all these great books that various friends online will mention.

In fact, as you may have noticed on my sidebar, I belong to Goodreads and I'm starting to save my newsletters and updates from different friends. I have a lot of catching up to do. I also plan to get library cards for the Peanuts. They're reading now and we can take advantage of the leveled readers for them to check out. The Boss is excited to have a library again. We enjoy checking out DVDs there and he's already planning on checking out all the Animorphs DVDs.

I brought all my grandmother's knitting needles with me and they're going back with me too (along with my cross stitch supplies). I've been able to find yarns fairly close to what's required when I make up items from Lion Brand, but several of my patterns are for yarns from LB that I can't find similar ones for over here. It'll be nice to have stores nearby that have the yarns I want for these patterns.

I won't have to worry about water and electricity! I can do whatever laundry needs to be done, whenever it needs to be done, without checking to make sure there's water in a tank and we're not on generator. Actually I can usually do a load on cold during the day when the generator isn't being to taxed, but sometimes I have use hot water and that won't work on generator. The clothesline is gone. I'm hoping that Baba can get a new one put up for me while he's there. It will be so good for the electric bill.

I've gotten used to washing the dishes by hand. But I do miss a dishwasher. We have a ton of dishes back home. There's the set Mom got us for Christmas a few years ago as well as a set from Grandma. It's so nice to just rinse dishes after a meal and putting them in the dishwasher to be done after supper. Let them airdry all night and just put away in the morning. I hadn't missed it the whole time I lived here but it's something I'm looking forward to lately. Go figure!

There are plenty of things here that I'll miss once I'm there. But I think I'll get over them.

Thought weekends were for relaxing

Today wasn't your typical Friday. Instead of tutoring and then cleaning, I had the Peanuts home with me. Baba sent me an sms at 1:30 this morning telling me he wanted to talk about Aunt when I got home from taking the Boss to school. So we chatted while they got ready to go with me and then we headed out to school for parent-teacher conferences. The Boss had school because it was field day. You know, one of those days where I thank God I'm not teaching there. Even though I did apply and interview and really wanted to work there. Today I'm grateful it fell through. LOL Been there, done that, and do NOT miss field day. Although it's probably worlds better than field day in q8 and all that sand.

After their conferences (they're geniuses, btw) we came home for a bit to relax and then went to the park in Bikfaya. The Peanuts played and had a blast and then we headed back to school to see the Boss swim. But he decided he didn't want to swim. Some little farts (who are really big ones) were throwing rocks and he got one in the forehead. So he decided to just hang out with his friends instead. We made plans for his best friend to come home with us and then I took the Peanuts out to lunch.

I told the man there (he's either the owner or the son of the owner) that we're moving back to the States this summer and I need to eat as much shawarma between now and the end of June as possible. He's going to get very familiar with my family in the coming weeks.

We headed back to school and got the boys. They're playing PS2 and Wii until time to head out for taekwondo. We might be bringing another friend home afterward for a sleepover. And this is only Friday. I wonder what the rest of the weekend has in store for me. Something tells me that sleep isn't on the list.

Finally!

We've been having trouble with our water...again. For the last few weeks our tank upstairs has been filling very slowly. SIL came over before she left on her trip and tried to see if something was blocking the pipe or messing up the valve. While checking it, she dropped her flashlight in the tank. Not good.

We borrowed a magnet from a friend but that didn't work. The Boss went up with a couple of wire hangers taped together to try to pick it up. Didn't work.

Today I went looking for one of those doohickies with the claw at the end that you squeeze closed to pick up stuff. I looked at the hardware store in Broumana. They had a couple but too small. Wouldn't work on a flashlight, even a small one like the one lost.

We went down to Dora, to City Mall, and checked at Sultan Center, a big supermarket that also carries hardware, electronics, clothes, etc. They didn't have one. They suggested I check BHV, a big department store in the mall. I didn't even know they had a hardware department.

So we went down there and they had them! And, best of all, it was only $4. Even better. I may have to rethink that store. Just in time to move.

We came home and the Boss and I went upstairs to try it. Mission accomplished. The batteries had started to corrode but they hadn't leaked out of the flashlight though. So we no longer have to worry about battery acid in our water. (Don't worry...we don't drink it anyway. )

Long, sad day

Today I took Aunt to the hospital to see the doctor. They said what I suspected from our phone conversation. There's nothing that can be done. She has malignant tumors in her abdomen. It's too advanced.

There's some treatment they can give her to improve her quality of life however. She'll start next week. Her insurance refuses to cover any part of her care. They say she lied on her form. She didn't. They ask if you've had cancer (among other things) in the last 10 years. She hasn't. She had it 30 years ago. But they're notorious in this country for refusing to pay for things they should cover. We're still trying to get them to pay something for the Prince's tests back in March.

I don't know how I would have gotten along without Aunt 5 years ago. When the kids and I lived here before I didn't have a car. She would drive up here every week to take me grocery shopping. That involved taking a couple of toddlers with us as well. She worked horrible hours at the airport. She was usually exhausted when she got here and still would do it.

She cared for my MIL while she was sick and continued to cook and care for my husband and his sister and father up until the day my FIL died last year. She continued to cook regularly for my SIL, even though she's a pretty good cook herself. It's just what Aunt does.

I'm going to cook for her and her brother once a week. Between me and one of her sisters we should be able to keep them fed. Right now they're ordering out which Aunt hates to do. But they both have cancer, even though he's doing very well right now. But he's not a cook and she's too weak. I owe her some, I'd say.

Medical history? What medical history?

It's been a few years since I've had to deal with HIPAA and all the other stuff you have to deal with anytime you deal with the medical profession in the States. However, I'm not sure I can ever complain about some of that stuff again.

Thirty years ago Aunt had cancer. She received treatment and her family cared for her. However, until a few weeks ago, she didn't know she'd had cancer. Over here it's more than just common, it's practically a tradition to not tell people they have a life-threatening condition such as cancer. The reasoning is that it would just upset them and cause them unnecessary worry. So the doctor will tell the family first and then the family will decide what, if anything, to tell the patient.

Over the years Aunt has had various health issues. For the past year or so she's had some problems that have taken her to several doctors. If she hadn't been so difficult, one treatment for what the doctors thought it was would have at least had them where they might have found the largest tumor. But regardless, for the past 30 years she has been giving incomplete medical histories because she hasn't known her medical history. If she had, she could have told her doctors and they would have probably run different tests and been looking for a possible recurrence. However, since she didn't even know she's had cancer she couldn't even tell them she'd had it.Now it looks like it's too late to treat what they've found. We'll know more after Wednesday morning.

I guess it shouldn't be too surprising that the typical response to bad news is to pretend it doesn't exist. Why else would it be illegal to teach contemporary Lebanese history in school? (But that's another peeve for another post.)

Things to do

My to-do list is growing by leaps and bounds.

I have to finish checking up on the animals and what they need to bring them into the States. It seems as far as national rules, they're fine. Rabies shots for Elektra and not so important for Dora. However, I need to check on what our state requires. So I need to call our vet back home tonight. The downside to that is that when the kids are home it's a little hard to handle important phone calls. So I'll have to call after the Peanuts are in bed. Luckily we have that 8 hour time difference. (I'm not always so positive about it.)

I also need to start finding out what kind of internet service is available for us now out on the farm. We've always had dial-up. When we left SBC didn't have any service for us beyond our phone line. I'm hoping that in the last 5 years they've gotten something better to offer us. I'm sure it'll be expensive but with Baba taking classes online, dial-up won't cut it. He has to download materials to read as well as submit papers and take tests. We had Dish Network for our TV when we lived there and our neighbors' son, whose living there now to take care of the place, has Direct TV. We should still have the Dish Network dishes around somewhere so I'd imagine that if one or both of them offer internet we should just have to decide which price is right. I really hope we can come up with something workable. If we go with something through SBC, while I'd miss a lot of the stuff on the dish, I also don't mind giving it up to afford the internet. It's way too easy to waste time in front of the boob tube even with just local channels on.

I need to make sure I have the kids' school and medical records together and easy to keep track of. Luckily the process to enroll them in our school district is much easier than over here. I don't have to have school records notarized by half a dozen government offices before they'll take them. I just show up with this year's report cards, immunization records, etc. Also need a bill with our name and address on it.

I keep flip flopping. I love living here and I'm going to miss so many things about Lebanon. But, I'm so happy to be going home. It will be nice to just do a load of laundry and not have to stop and think if I have water and electricity. As we head into the summer months it will be more and more difficult to have these things at the same time. I'll miss the much cheaper doctor's bills and pharmacy trips, but nothing's perfect.

Well, off to fold some laundry and then tidy up the house after a weekend of kids playing. Also, need to dig us out from under all the tissue I've gone through this weekend. That's the bad part of spring...everything blooms!